2 Years Later.

Charlie

“Nick, we have to get up,” I tried to sound more insistent than I actually was.

“Mmm, no,” Nick replied between kisses.

“My sister will be here soon,” I tried to protest but not breaking away from his lips more than I had to.

“Urgh, but kissing is so fun,” he groaned.

“Not, if my sister walks in on us kissing…again,” I managed to get out between his constant assault on my lips.

I can’t believe it had been two years since I moved here. After the dramatic showdown with Ben as Nick liked to teasingly call it, Nick took me on the back of a scooter to see some of his favourite sights. We saw the Basilica de Son Bou, the Cova des Coloms and the Naveta d’Es Tudons, before having dinner at sunset at the Artutx Lighthouse. The entire day was amazing and neither of us wanted it to end. Whenever Nick could get away from the day to day running of the hotel, he would find a way for us to spend it together. It wasn’t all sightseeing, sometimes it was just relaxing on the beach, by the pool or getting to know each other in the little villa.

The end of the two weeks I’d originally booked for my honeymoon with Ben came around far too quickly for both of us. I didn’t want to leave and Nick didn’t want me to leave either. We’d only just started to get to know each other but we already knew we were falling for each other fast. The night before I was due to head back home, I was packing my case and Nick kept taking every out again as soon as I placed it inside.

“Nick, I’m never going to get this packing done if you keep taking everything out,” I tried to chastise him.

“Good,” he pouted like a child.

“Nick,” I groaned while still trying to pack with him still being unhelpful.

“I don’t want you to go,” did he think I wanted to leave?

“Stay with me,” he stated as if it was the most simple thing in the world. I turned, shocked, to look at him, lost for words.

“What…what did you say?” did he really just ask me to stay with him, I must have heard him wrong.

“I said,” more seductively this time as he stepped closer to me and wrapped his arms around my waist, “stay with me.”

“Nick, we’ve only known each other 2 weeks, do you know how crazy that sounds.”

“So. I like you, you like me and I really like liking you. So why not stay with me,” he made it sound so simple.

“Ok,” wait, did I just say that?

“Really,” his face lit up making up looking like an excited golden retriever, how could I say no to that.

Later that evening I found myself and all my stuff moved from the villa into Nick’s apartment. When I called Tori to explain that I was going to stay, she just replied, “Called it.” I’d been calling her regularly during my stay and each time I found myself talking about Nick, so she’d guessed I was falling for him, probably harder than I’d admitted to myself or Nick at that point.

Naturally, my Mum was furious about my sudden move but being over 1000 miles away I thankfully didn’t have to listen to her disapproval. A week later Tori brought my things from the flat I shared with Ben over to Menorca, I really didn’t have very much stuff to call my own. She told me his nose was set in bandages when she turned up there to collect my things. Ben had made no effort to pack up any of my things, so Tori had to go through and pack up everything that she knew was mine. He spent a lot of time she was there trying to make out that I was the cheater and how he had left me. She took a twisted pleasure in telling me that when he moved the topic on to same disgusting bile that he’d said in front of Nick at the hotel she’d decided to introduce him to a new world of pain when her knee met his balls.

When she’d arrived at the hotel she’d been directed back to our little apartment on her own because reception was over-run with a party of guests that were struggling with some directions. We must not have pushed to door fully closed when we’d come back to get ready, so when she walked in Nick was on top of me and his lips were kissing my neck in the way he already knew made me moan with pleasure. Rather than coughing or leaving the room and knocking like a normal person, Tori announced her presence by saying “Well done then,” causing both of us to turn towards her in shock.

I forced Nick to get up out of bed so we could get ready for Tori’s arrival. As we were showering together under the hot spray, I thought to myself, not for the first time, that I could see myself spending the rest of my life with this man. I think, and hoped, he felt the same. Tori’s visit wasn’t just so we could spend time together, she was also bringing our grandad’s ring with her so that one day soon, I could ask Nick to marry me.

Nick

I can’t believe I punched him; I’d never punched anyone before. My Mum always taught me it was better to use my words rather than my fists and I’d always followed that, until today. But the things Ben were saying about Charlie were just so horrible, and then when he called him…that, I just snapped. My hand was throbbing, serves me right really. If I could go back and redo those moments, I can’t say I wouldn’t do it again. What did Charlie see in that guy?

I think back to before Ben burst into the dining room, I’d asked him out. God, that feels like a lifetime ago now. I must have seemed like a real creep to him, who does that? Who asks out a guy who just the day before was supposed to be marrying someone else? I start rubbing the back of my neck with my good hand, a habit I’d done for years whenever I was stressed.

But then, as I was trying to escape from being so embarrassing, he’d reached out for me. The next thing I knew he was on top of me, and I wanted to kiss him soooo much. He’s such a beautiful man. I think, he might have wanted to kiss me too, but maybe that was just my imagination. It must have been my imagination. But what if it wasn’t? I’d barely known this guy for a day, and yet I wanted to know everything there is to know about him. I wanted to take him out, I wanted to stay in with him, I just wanted to be with him.

“Urgh” I groaned out loud at the ridiculousness of how much I’d already fallen for him.

“Haha, you ok there?” Charlie startled me, I hadn’t realised he’d come back, I turned and the smile on his face was infectious. He was walking back towards me and I just wanted to pull him to me and memorise his features, those beautiful blue eyes, his amazing dimples, the way the curls on the top of his head gently bounced as he moved. I wanted to feel my fingers in his hair as my lips touched his.

“Hi,” that simple word from Charlie’s mouth had butterflies floating around inside me.

“Hi,” I smiled back, he was close enough that I could smell him again. Oranges. It was intoxicating.

“Was everything ok?” I ask, hoping the phone call wasn’t more bad news and selfishly hoping it didn’t mean Charlie would have to leave so soon, when we were only just getting to know each other.

“Hmm,” he hummed distractedly.

“The phone call, was everything ok?”

“Oh, yeah. It was my sister. Ben managed to find out where I was from her. She was warning me he was coming after me,” Charlie explained, “A bit late for that I guess,” he joked.

“Haha, yeah just a bit,” I couldn’t help but smile when I looked at him.

“How’s your hand?” he asked reaching out to take a look under the bundle of ice causing me to wince as he lifted it.

“Is it always this painful after punching someone,” I tried to joke through the pain.

“I wouldn’t know,” he giggled.

“Haha, I suppose not.”

“Are you saying I’m small and weak?” he asked with a serious look on his face.

“What, no…I…” I stammered, horrified that I’d offended him until he started laughing.

“Hahaha, you’re face. Nick I’m only teasing you.”

I pulled him towards me with my good hand, so our bodies were close together again.

“So cheeky, what am I going to do with you Mr Spring,” I teased in what I hoped was my best low and sultry voice. It seemed to work, he was definitely blushing now.

“Anything you want,” he replied breathlessly, now it was my turn to blush.

“Can I…Can I kiss you?” I asked, trying to keep my groans of frustration at myself on the inside this time.

“Please,” he practically whispered.

I tentatively leaned forward, closing the distance between us. Time seemed to slow around us, there was nothing but me and Charlie. I could feel his breathe against my skin now as we got closer and closer. Finally, our lips came together, finally. It started gentle, tentative, electrifying. I pulled him up with my one good hand, so he was sitting on my lap, grateful for my years of rugby giving me great strength in my arms. Once he was settled on top of me, we both deepened the kiss, neither one of us wanting to break apart. Exploring each other’s mouths with our tongues, his hands wrapped tightly around me. With my good hand I reached up to run my fingers through his curls, they were so soft, a low moan slipped from Charlie’s mouth as I gave a gentle tug to his hair.

All too soon we both had to come up for air, both of us groaning that it wasn’t enough. Would it ever be enough, could I ever have enough of Charlie Spring.

“So,” he started still sat on my lap in the middle of the hotel kitchen, “did you still want to go on that date?”

I barked out a laugh and leaned in to kiss him again, this man was going to be the death of me.

Charlie

Nick showed me back to the kitchen that was situated behind reception and alongside the dining room. I pulled out a small stool from the side and got Nick to sit down while I went across to the freezer to get some ice. After first opening a couple of doors that turned out to be fridges instead, they all look the same in these commercial kitchens. After finding the right door, I got a few ice cubes and wrapped a dish towel around them to carry them back across for Nick’s knuckles to hopefully prevent them from bruising.

I couldn’t look him in the eye, “I’m so sorry Nick, I’ll pack my things and leave. I’m sorry Ben came here and starting causing so much chaos.”

“Char, look at me,” Nick’s gentle voice felt so soothing but I just felt so bad that I couldn’t bare to see the hurt that must be in his eyes. Hurt I caused by bringing my relationship drama to his hotel, his Mum’s hotel.

Using a finger from his unbruised hand, Nick tilted my chin up so I had to see his face for the first time, there wasn’t any hurt there, just concern? Concern for me? How could he be concerned for me after everything I’ve caused.

“Char, none of this is your fault. You didn’t bring Ben here, you didn’t cause him to say all those horrible things. If anything, I should be the one apologising. I know it was wrong for me to punch him but when I heard him call you…that…I just snapped. I’m sorry.”

“I kinda liked it when you punched him,” I blushed.

“Ha,” Nick blurted out, as surprised by my openness as I was.

“I don’t know how he found me here. I never told him about the honeymoon, it was going to be a surprise,” I tried to think back, could Ben track my phone? No I don’t think so, I suggested it once, but he accused me of not trusting him. Clearly, I shouldn’t have trusted him after all.

The door from reception opened and a member of staff called through to Nick, “Nick, there’s a call at the desk for a Mr Charlie Spring but we don’t seem to have anyone in the system by that time, should I tell them there’s no one staying here with that name?”

“I’m Charlie Spring,” I replied, confused as to why there was a call for me, the only person who knew I was here was Tori and she always called my mobile. I felt my pockets and realised I didn’t have my phone with me. I remember now, I left it on charge in the room.

“Keep that ice on there, I’ll be right back,” I said to Nick before following the other man out to the desk.

I picked up the phone that was lying on its side on the desk, “Hello?”

“Charlie?”

“Tori, what’s happened, is it Mum and Dad, Olly?”

“No, their fine, I’ve been trying to ring you for hours.”

“Sorry, I left my phone on charge in the villa and then things got a bit…complicated.”

“I need to warn you that Ben might be on his way there, when you weren’t at the registry office he came to our parents house. Jane answered the door and he explained to her that he was your roommate and that he needed to get in touch with you but wasn’t sure where you’d gone. Made out like you’d disappeared, which of course made her panic. She made me show him where you were. I’m so sorry Charlie, you need to get out of there.”

“Tori, it’s ok.”

“Look, I can’t really talk right now but Ben has already been here and now he’s gone.”

“Are you ok?” Tori’s emotions showing through more than usual, clearly worried I might be hurt.

“I’m fine, he was really horrible but I stood up to him and then when he got really bad, Nick, he’s the guy who owns the hotel. Well, when thing’s got bad, Nick may have…punched Ben in the face,” I rushed out that last part as if feeling a weight lift off my chest.

“Well done then,” Tori replied.

“I promise, I’ll call you later ok,”

“Ok, take care Charlie.”

“You too.”

I went back to the kitchen to check on Nick.

Nick

Charlie and I both turned towards the dining room doors as they crashed open. An average looking guy with dark hair was standing there screaming in our direction.

“What do you think you’re doing?” he screamed as he stormed over towards us.

“Ben,” screeched Charlie while still lying on top of me from where we had fallen just moments ago. Before we could do anything Ben was grabbing hold of Charlie by the back of his jumper and pulling him to his feet. I vaguely heard him say to Charlie, “You’re wearing a jumper? It’s not even cold.” Once Charlie was off me I started to get back onto my feet too. By the time I was up, Ben was dragging Charlie backwards by his jumper saying the most horrible things to him.

“You’re so pathetic, throwing yourself at any boy that will look at you,” he spit.

“Were you trying to humiliate me, by not showing up to the wedding,” each sentence filled with vile and hatred.

“You’re coming back with me, no one else will have you.”

I went after them, trying not to stumble over the legs of the chairs sticking out in the dining room. I caught up to them in reception and stepped in front of Ben’s path forcing him to stop.

“Get your hands off him,” I screamed, making sure my chest was puffed out to make me seem even more imposing in front of him.

“He’s mine, I’ll do whatever I want,” he hissed.

“After what you did to him?” I laughed.

Ben turned to Charlie, “Have you been telling lies about me Charlie boy?”

Charlie just looked down to the ground without saying anything.

“You were kissing a girl the night before you were due to marry him,” it was my turn to hiss.

Ben’s head whipped around to me, “Who even are you, this is nothing to do with you.”

“How long?” Charlie softly spoke, barely above a whisper.

I’m not sure if Ben heard him or not, until Charlie spoke up again, much stronger this time, “How long have you been cheating on me Ben?”

Ben turned, I think he was shocked that Charlie had stood up to him. I’m guessing that’s not something Charlie has often done before, if ever.

“I haven’t cheated on you, clearly you were cheating on me with this oaf,” he said pointing over his shoulder at me. I chose to bite my tongue, he can call me all the names he wants.

Charlie pulled out his phone and turned the reel from his friend towards Ben, “How can you stand there any deny it?”

Ben changed tactic now, it was almost like he had a completely different personality. He switched from the vile hatred he had been spewing to try and appear all sweet and romantic, “You know what you mean to me Charlie, we’ve been together for years, you can’t just throw this away,” his hand grazing down Charlie’s arm. Was this guy for real, I hope Charlie could see through his crap, if he chose to go with him, I’d be devastated but I wouldn’t stop him. Even if I really, really wanted to.

“It’s over Ben, I don’t know how long you’ve been cheating on me, maybe you’ve always been cheating on me behind my back but I’m not letting you do it to me anymore. I deserve better than this, I deserve better than you,” Charlie confidently replied, I felt so proud of him for standing up for himself and a huge grin was now plastered across my face.

Ben wasn’t happy about Charlie standing up for himself, the Mr Nice-Guy act now long forgotten, “Really, you think anyone else would be interested in you, you’re just a pathetic, little, fag.”

At that point I saw red, I swung Ben round to face me and punched him as hard as I could in the face causing him to fall to the floor.

“I’ll see your fired for this,” he tried to scare me while he held his now bloody nose.

“GET. OUT. OF MY. HOTEL!” I shouted back at him, “You are not welcome here, and if you try and come back, I will call the police and have you arrested for trespassing.”

“You haven’t heard the last of this,” he snarled before skulking off out the reception doors. I shook my hand out, suddenly feeling sore after punching Ben in the face. I looked at Charlie for the first time since I hit Ben, a look of fear and concern fighting for dominance across his face. Shit. The last thing I ever wanted to do was ever scare this beautiful man. It seems concern won out and he tentatively stepped forward to take my hand, looking down at my red knuckles.

“We should get some ice on that,” he smiled up at me.

Charlie

Nick and I talked for what felt like hours. It wasn’t all sadness and regrets; it was laughs too. We found out we’d grown up just 15 minutes’ walk from each other, and had he not ended up going to a rugby academy for Secondary School we might have ended up meeting sooner. Only when I struggled to stifle a yawn did Nick decide it was time to call it a night. Things with him felt so easy and so comfortable, I wish we’d met at school instead of me meeting Ben. How different might my life had been. That’s assuming of course if he wasn’t straight, with body like that and a love of rugby he had to be straight. But it was to allow myself to imagine as I drifted off to sleep that night.

I awoke the next morning with the sun streaming through the windows and a feeling of calm that wasn’t there just the morning before. I reached over to my phone to check the time and noticed the battery had died. I was so engrossed in my thoughts of Nick last night that I must have forgotten to put it on charge. I opened my bag, rooted round to find the charger and set it up on the side in my room. After showering and dressing, I didn’t give my phone another thought and headed out into the hotel where Nick told me they did a daily breakfast buffet with muffins and pastries that he baked himself. Was there anything that man couldn’t do?

I head into the hotel’s dining room and all thoughts of eating are forgotten. Standing in front of the table wearing the cutest apron and the tightest white shirt I’d ever seen was Nick. He’d just put a tray of pastries down and stopped suddenly when he turned and was looking in my direction. I looked behind me to see if he was looking at someone else and then I realised, it was me he was looking at. His face lit up with that beautiful smile again. Aside from our now matching goofy grins, we were both frozen in place just smiling at each other.

It was only when the door behind me opened and collided with me that I was forced out of our trance and started to move towards him. He matched my movements and met me halfway.

“Hi”

“Hi”

“Did you sleep well?”

“I did, thanks to you,” that made him blush, I loved that I could affect him like that.

“Erm, I was…wondering, erm…” for someone who comes across as so confident and self-assured, he definitely seemed to get quite flustered when he talked to me. Could he possibly be interested in me, like I was in him?

“You were wondering, huh, what about?” I couldn’t help but tease him, it was just too easy his face turning ever more crimson.

“Well, you see, erm…” he started rubbing the back of his neck nervously, maybe he wasn’t as straight as first thought.

“IhavethisafternoonoffandwaswonderingmaybeifIdon’tknowyoumightwanttogosomewherewithme,” well that was different.

“I think you might have to slow down there a bit Nick,” I giggled, “I didn’t quite catch that.”

He let out a long breathe and then tried again, “Sorry, what I was trying to say, was I have the afternoon off, and I was wondering, if you might want to go somewhere,” he paused before hurriedly adding, “with me.” He was so cute.

“Like a date?” I asked, hopefully.

“Well, erm, I mean, if you want it to be,” he stammered again, “I mean, it’s ok if you don’t want to, I know you’ve just been through a lot with your ex. Wait, he is your ex right or are you hoping you might get back together. Oh god, please forget I said anything,” he started to race back to the kitchen so I quickly grabbed his arm to stop him, but his momentum sent us both flying down to the floor. I landed right on top of him inches away from his face. His kissable lips so close to mine. I wanted to know what it felt like to kiss him, to feel our lips touch and our tongues tangle together. I started to lean towards him slowly, allowing him to push me off if he wasn’t what he wanted. We were so close when the doors to dining room crashed open.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Nick and I both turned towards the doors, my jaw dropped and screeched, “Ben”.

Charlie

“Yesterday was supposed to be our wedding day.”

I looked up at Nick’s face and saw nothing but patience and kindness in his eyes.

“I was ready to marry him, I was dressed and at the registry office waiting for him to arrive. He’d wanted to arrive separately, something about not seeing each other before we were married.”

“Well, it is tradition,” Nick gave me a small smile while he tried to lighten the mood.

When I didn’t continue after a few minutes Nick tentatively reached out and put his hand on mine in my lap before he spoke, “Did he not turn up?”

I shook my head, “I, erm,” no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get the words out. Instead, I moved one of my hands from under his, took my phone out of my pocket and opened to conversation from Tao before handing Nick my phone.

Slightly confused, Nick took it and looked at the conversation which started with Tao saying he thought Ben might be cheating on me. He watched the reel before closing the phone, putting it down and pulling me into his strong arms for unexpected but very much needed hug. I hadn’t realised until that moment that I was crying again, it wasn’t the earth-shattering tears that placed me in Nick’s arms like before, just a wave of sadness as I finally put everything that had happened out there into the world.

Nick

That poor man, how could someone do something so horrible to someone who seemed so sweet. I held him to me, not wanting to let ago, trying to convey to him how sorry I was for him but without it coming across as pity. I’m not a violent guy, but I wanted to hurt Ben for everything he had put Charlie through.

I don’t know how long I held him before I pulled away slightly to look at his face, there were streaks of tears silently falling down his cheeks. On instinct I reached out to wipe them away, part of me wishing I could wipe away all the suffering he’s been through, all the pain.

“Sorry,” he said as he tried to pull away from my hold.

I reached out and turned his chin, so he was facing me again, “Hey, don’t apologise, you have nothing to be sorry for Char.”

“Char?” his eyebrows shot up as he stopped trying to move away. Did I really just say that.

“Erm, sorry,” now it was my turn to be embarrassed.

“Don’t be, I liked it,” he said mischievously in what sounded like a flirting tone with smile that revealed the most amazing dimples causing me to blush. Was he flirting with me? It must be my imagination, he only left his fiancé yesterday, and who knew if they would patch things up. I couldn’t deny though that those dimples were stirring things in me that I had never felt before.

I’d realised at university I was bisexual; I had the biggest crush on the captain of our rugby team. It turned out he was pansexual, and we did hook up a few times after practice, but it was nothing more than a bit of fun. We even once had a threesome with a girl we’d met in a club. She said she loved our strong rugby arms and wanted to see us make-out together. We were still good mates, but we didn’t really see each other much, especially since I moved to Menorca to take care of my Mum almost a year ago.

I must have zoned out for a moment because Charlie placed his hand on my cheek again, sending sparks through me just as they had back in reception. “Nick?”

“Sorry, I..” I was lost for words, the effect Charlie had on me was unreal. I realised my arms from round him and suddenly felt self-conscious.

“Are you ok? I know I just dumped a lot of my own crazy on you, but you seemed upset when I found you in reception before.” God he was thoughtful too, he was going to be the death of me.

“Yeah, I was just thinking about my mum. This was her place, she…” I felt voice start to tremble.

“It’s ok, you don’t have to..” Charlie began to speak but I raised my hand to cut him off before I continued.

“She died, about 6 months ago. This place,” I gestured around us, “was her dream. We used to come here all the time growing up as a family, me, my Mum, my brother and my aunts, uncles, and cousins. She loved it here, so when I went to uni and David, that’s my brother, had moved out and bought his own flat, she decided to sell our old home and move out here.” I smiled remembering how happy she had been when she had our first guests here.

Charlie didn’t say anything, letting me sit with my thoughts before I continued, “Just after I finished Uni, we found out she had cancer, they tried to treat it but 6 months ago she lost the battle. I vowed to make this place special for her, I even renamed it after her. She said to me that things she loved most in the world, where me and my brother and this place.”

Without another word, Charlie pulled me into his arms and held me close to him. He smelled sweet like oranges, and I knew I was in trouble.

Charlie

I’d never told anyone everything that happened in my relationship with Ben, partly because Ben insisted on keeping us so secret. I’d even kept things about us from Geoff, my therapist, he won’t be happy about that when I next see him.

I didn’t really know where best to start, I suppose the beginning might have made sense but instead I felt the need to stop hearing that name by correcting Nick.

“My name isn’t Mr Hope-Spring,” maybe that wasn’t the best way to word that as Nick now appeared concerned like I was some crazy person that had taken someone else’s booking. I quickly rushed to say, “I mean, I was supposed to be Mr Hope-Spring, this was supposed to be our honeymoon, but we didn’t get as far as getting married, so I’m just Charlie Spring.” His face relaxed but settled into looking sorry for me. I suppose I should have expected that.

“Sorry, I’m not being very clear.”

“You say sorry a lot.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t,” Nick replied with a small smile.

“I kinda want to say it again,” I smiled back.

“Why don’t you start at the beginning?”

“Ok,”

Ben and I first met at Truham secondary school for boys. I was in the music room playing the drums, I’d found it a great way to work out some of my negative emotions after I’d been bullied at school after being accidentally outed the year before. Ben came in one lunch time and squeezed himself onto the small drum stool with me. He put his hand on my knee and told me how brave I was for ‘coming out’ the year before, as if my life hadn’t been made a living hell by the other boys after someone overheard my best friend Tao talking about me being gay. Maybe he didn’t know about the bullying, but I don’t see how he could have missed it, I was the talk of Truham that year until one of the teachers finally found out.

Ben kissed me for the first time in that music room, it was the first time I’d ever kissed anyone but especially a boy. It felt like that little emoji with all the hearts around it 🥰. A boy liked me, and he wanted to kiss me, I felt like I was walking on cloud nine. He told me not to tell anyone, and at the time I thought nothing more of it. I knew from first hand experience what it was like to be forced out before you were ready, so I understood. This went on for a few weeks, he’d find me in the music room, and we’d spend the time kissing. He’d leave quickly each time the bell went for next lessons, reminding me to not tell anyone about us.

At some point it progressed to us meeting up before and after school in the library, thinking back now I guess he chose that because he knew it would be empty. We never told anyone else at Truham about us the whole time we were there. We carried on the same way for the rest of that year, never really doing anything besides kissing. Over that first summer, he would get me to meet him in some really strange places, places he knew wouldn’t be seen. He never wanted to come over my house, and we never went to his either, even if we knew our parents weren’t going to be home.

Once we returned to school, me for Year 11 and him for his first year of Sixth Form, he started wanting more than kissing. He would start telling me that ‘all his friends were doing it’ and that it was ‘no big deal’. When I tried to say I wasn’t ready for that on way occasion in a corridor after school, he’d thrown me hard against the wall, gripped my wrists together tightly in one hand and started trying to reach inside my trousers. He only stopped when he’d heard someone coming down the corridor. I stayed off school for a few days after that, I didn’t want anyone to see the bruises he’d left on my wrists.

He text me a few times after, saying he was sorry, saying he didn’t mean to and that he was just so turned on by me. I tried to ignore his messages, he hated that. He got really angry with me and his texts getting progressively more aggressive. When I got back to the school, I thought he was an odd mix of apologetic and aggressive. He was saying he was sorry for what he did, but at the same time he was kissing me as hard as he could, almost like he was trying to lay claim to me.

I wish I could say that was the only time Ben had got physical with me. While Ben was still at Truham he continued to insist we didn’t tell anyone about us. This was also when I found out that Ben was the jealous type. A boy in the same year as Ben was starting flirting with me in school, and Ben saw. When we met up later on, he got really mad at me, he broke my arm and it was in plaster for weeks.

“I should have left at that point, any normal person would have left at that point,” the tears had started to fall again.

Nick reached out and placed his hand on mine, “It’s ok, you don’t have to go on, if you don’t want to,” his face didn’t show signs of pity, just care.

I sniffed, “No, it’s ok, I need to tell someone,”

Things got a little easier when Ben finished sixth form, I still had one more year left at Truham before I would go to university and Ben decided to take a gap year so that we could be together at university. He convinced me it would be easier for us to be together if we were away from the pressures of our families and friends. That we could be together properly without worrying about anyone finding out. I’d given up long ago of trying to get him to come out so the thought that we could properly be together made me feel so special. Made it feel like everything we’d been through was finally going to be worth it.

With Ben not being at school every day meant I was able to relax a lot more, I didn’t need to worry about him getting jealous of me just talking to other boys at school. Ben would still text me every day when I was at school, looking back I wonder if that was him just checking up on me. But we didn’t really see each other during that year. By the time I graduated from Truham and we were preparing to go off to Durham University together. He’d been accepted following his results the year before, so I had made my first choice too.

Ben’s parents paid for a flat for him, it was small but big enough for the two of us. Of course, they didn’t know I was staying there, it was just convenient for him to keep me close. It was once we were  living together that I finally felt ready to take our relationship further. I’d always pictured my first time to be with someone who would take care of me, make me feel like I was the most important guy in the world and then hold me close to them after while enjoying gentle, slow kisses. You could describe Ben’s, ‘style’, as the opposite of that. He wasn’t gentle, he didn’t really care, it was all about getting him off. Once he’d cum, he’d pull out and jump in the shower. He never cared if I enjoyed it, or if I got off too.

When we were out and about on campus, he still didn’t really treat me like his boyfriend. Sure, unlike at Truham he had no problem talking to me in front of others, people knew we lived together so I guess it would have been weird if he didn’t talk to me. But he never wanted to hold hands or kiss me in front of his friends. He’d introduce me as his roommate or ‘the guy he lived with’, then when we’d get home he’d apologise and melt me with kisses so that I wouldn’t want to leave him.

Finally, after 3 years at university, I assumed we’d move back to our parents, and he wouldn’t want anything more to do with me. I was prepared for that, really, I knew he still wasn’t out to his parents, and I didn’t think that was likely to change any time soon. But as we were getting ready in our suits for graduation day, he turned to me, and I asked me if I wanted to get married. It was so, unexpected that I said yes. I was so happy that he wanted to be with me. He got a job working at his dad’s firm in London and got a flat near there for the two of us. That was 6 months ago.

I paused to compose myself. Nick just waited patiently, letting me take the time I needed. I took a deep breath before I continued.

Nick

“Are you ok?” Mr Hope-Spring asked me as his hand moved from my shoulder to my cheek. The small skin-to-skin contact felt like sparks of electricity suddenly passed between us, causing me to instinctively lean into his touch.

“I should be the one, asking you that.”

“I’m fine, I’m sorry for…before…you know…” he stammered, his smile now gone and his face tilted down towards the floor. His hand now down by his side.

I reached for his hand and waited until he looked back up at me, “hey, there’s no need to apologise,” I paused before continuing, “Do you want to talk about it?”

There was uncertainty on his face, like he was torn between needing to speak and needing to bury everything as deep down as possible and hide from the world. We stood in silence, unmoving, I gave him time to think about how he wanted to respond. All I wanted in that moment was to take away his pain, to put that smile back on the sweet man’s face. I wanted to wrap him up in my arms, hold him tight and never let go.

“I’m sorry,” there he was apologising again, “it’s…nothing,” he started looking down to the floor again.

I reached my free hand to his chin and gently lifted it so he was facing me again, “I’m a good listener,” I tried with my best caring smile which caused his own to start to show at the edges of his lips.

“I suppose,…maybe,…we could get some tea,” he shakily suggested. “No, that’s a stupid idea, forget I said anything,” he interrupted before I had a chance to respond. He turned to try and walk away but with the hand I still had holding his I gently pulled him back towards me. At least that was my intention, but with him trying to get away it turned into me accidentally pulling him into my lap.

Before he could do or say anything else, I wrapped my arms around him to make sure he didn’t fall and said, “hey, it’s a good suggestion, I’d love to get some Tea.”

“Won’t your boss mind, shouldn’t you be working?”

“My boss,” I was slightly confused, the intoxicating scent of Mr Hope-Spring combined with him now being very close to me had me feeling a little light-headed. Once I realised what he meant, I replied, “It’ll be fine, we could go to the little bar down the corridor if you want?” I was starting to notice that he wore his emotions so clearly on his face, he clearly wasn’t keen on somewhere as public as the bar so instead I suggested, “or, there’s tea back in the villa, if you wanted somewhere more…comfortable,” what was I doing, I thought for a moment that would have scared him off even more but I soon heard his almost silent reply of, “Okay.”

I reluctantly released him from my arms and helped him to his feet before getting up myself. I quickly placed a sign on the front desk to tell anyone that arrived how to get hold me while I was away, I hoped no one would need me while I was gone, and then Mr Hope-Spring and I walked silently back to the villa he’d booked.

Charlie

I used my key to let us both into the villa, I’d long forgotten about the towels I’d actually gone to ask for. I don’t know why but there was something about Nick that made me think, maybe I could tell him about what happened, maybe sharing it with someone who I’d never see again would let me work through my feelings. I started to walk over to the small table that held the kettle and other tea things when Nick placed his hand on my arm breaking the comfortable silence that had formed between us to say, “please, let me,” gesturing for me to see on the small sofa in front of us.

I blushed again at how kind Nick was and nodded in appreciation while taking a seat, I didn’t quite trust my own voice yet. Nick got to work preparing two cups of tea.

“How do you take it Mr Hope-Spring?”

“Charlie,” he looked confused at my response, “Sorry, I mean please, call me Charlie.”

He smiled, “Charlie,” as if he was trying it out to see how it fit, “how do you take your tea Charlie?” the smile never leaving his adorable face.

I smiled back, “just with milk please.”

Once he prepared our teas he came to join me on the small sofa. It was only just big enough for the two of us, our legs touching because of the lack of space and giving me the feeling like sparks were passing between us through the points at which we connected.

Nick didn’t say anything. He seemed to just be waiting for me to talk if I wanted to, when I was ready to. Could he be any sweeter? I took a few tentative sips of my tea, and began to tell Nick all about me and Ben Hope.

Charlie

I woke up dazed and confused. I don’t remember falling asleep, let alone fully clothed. I even still had my shoes on. My mother, the infuriating Jane Spring, would have had a fit if anyone dared to even go beyond the hall in their shoes, let alone have them on the furniture. That has always stuck with me even though I haven’t lived at home with her and her obsessive control since I moved away to go to uni.

As I started to come to, I realised my phone must have woken me, it was vibrating in my pocket. I pulled it out to see why and was presented with my sister Tori’s name on the screen. I wanted to ignore it, but I knew she would just keep ringing until I answered her.

“Hello,” I groggily said as I picked up the call.

“Why are you in Menorca?” I had to stifle a laugh; Tori was always straight to the point. But how could she know I was in Menorca; I hadn’t told anyone I was coming here.

“Erm, what? I’m not, I’m” I stammered to try and lie before Tori interrupted me,

“I have you on Find my, I can see exactly where you are. Why are you in Menorca?”

I rubbed my face to try and wake myself up some more, how had I forgotten she could track my location. Tori had made me turn it on a few years ago when I was in a dark place. I was bullied at school and thought everyone would just be better off without me. I’d run away and was determined to kill myself. Tori found me before it was too late, it seems I didn’t run far enough away, but since then she’d made me promise to set my phone so that she could see where I was. She convinced me it was better she could see where I was than our Mum.

I groaned, “Urgh, I forgot about that stupid app, you know I’m an adult and can do what I want?”

“But you’re in Menorca,” she wasn’t going to give this one up and I was terrible at lying to Tori.

“I…just needed to get away,” it wasn’t a lie, it just wasn’t the whole truth, maybe she’d buy that?

“Alone?”

“Yes”

“What happened?” she knew me too well and if I wasn’t careful with what I said she’d be on the first plane here.

“Why did something have to happen?” I tried to play innocent, “Can’t I just have a break alone?”

Tori was quiet for a few moments, thinking about what I’d said.

“Something happened,” she stated as a matter of fact.

“Tori, I’m ok, honest, I just need some time. I promise to tell you everything but, not right now. Is that ok?”

More silence, please let it go for now I said to myself.

“You’re not thinking about hurting yourself again, are you?” she sounded worried.

“God, Tori, no,” I snapped back, “I Just really need time to get away from everything right now.”

Another pause.

“Ok, but I will be checking in with you and if you don’t answer I’m getting on the first plane there.”

I let out a sigh of relief that she was letting it go for now, I knew I wouldn’t get away with not telling her everything that had happened for long, but at least I could try and wrap my own head around it before I have to tell my sister.

“Fine.”

“Good. Talk soon little brother,” and without a further word she hung up.

I started to move to get off the bed when I felt something sticking to me. I reached down and found I was covered in rose petals. That’s when I remembered, the honeymoon package, I saw the heart of rose petals that had been delicately scattered on the bed and started crying in front of the man from the hotel. He sort of reminded me of a Golden Retriever, with his adorable face and excitable way he skipped round the desk. But that still didn’t explain how I ended up on the bed.

I swung my legs over the side and brushed off the petals from my clothes, trying to think back. I remember feeling like the ground had opened underneath me to drag me down, the heartbreak of seeing Ben in that reel hitting me all over again. I vaguely recall some strong arms wrapping themselves around me and then nothing until I woke up. He must have carried me, what was his name again, Nick. Nick must have carried me to the bed, urgh that’s so embarrassing.

I’d wanted to shower when I arrived at the hotel after the long flight overnight but obviously my plans had changed by my emotions taking over and knocking me out. I grabbed my toiletries from my bag, and I went to the bathroom in the little villa. I started laying out my things in just the right places, a habit I developed after years of therapy for my eating disorder. It gave me the control I needed of everyday things without restricting my eating, my therapist Geoff suggested it as a short-term solution to help me initially with my desire to regain control over things after I was outed at school and bullied for being gay.

I still wasn’t 100% over my eating disorder, it’s not something you ever really get over, but I had fewer bad days than I used to. But right now, I could feel my desire to control things was building again with my distress at having Ben snatched away from me. Logically I knew it was all his fault but there wasn’t anything logical about my reactions.

Just as I got my toiletries laid out, I went to put some towels somewhere I could reach them from the shower and that’s when I realised there weren’t any towels. I looked in the small cupboard in the bathroom and in the main room of the villa that was both lounge and bedroom but there weren’t any towels to be found. They must have forgotten when they were preparing all the honeymoon package. I thought I’d ring the reception but there was no phone in the room either, at least not that I could see, I’d have to go back and ask.

I could feel a small headache starting to form from the stress and started rubbing the space between my eyes to try and reduce the pressure before it could build. I found my key had been left on the bedside table, so I grabbed it, stuffed it in my pocket and left to head back to reception. Part of me hoping that Nick might still be there, I needed to apologise to him for my weird behaviour before.

I was approaching the desk and could see Nick sat back where he was when I first arrived. He seemed distracted, staring off into the distance. As I got closer, I could see tears falling down his face. He hadn’t noticed me approaching and I didn’t want t startle him, I gently called his name to get his attention, but he didn’t move. I tentatively reached out to place my hand on his shoulder and saw him quickly wipe the tears from his face before turning to me.

“Hi,” he smiled at me with the most beautiful smile I’d ever seen.

“Hi,” I hoped I wasn’t blushing.

Nick

I was so pleased to show off the work I’d put into our new honeymoon package to its first ever guests but as I stood there holding the door open for Mr Hope-Spring, he suddenly collapsed to the floor and burst into tears. I bent down close to him and tried calling his name, but he couldn’t hear me. I didn’t know what was wrong but my heart-ached for this adorable man who was so upset in front of me.

I cautiously wrapped my arms around him, in the hopes of comforting him, to let him know he wasn’t alone. I wasn’t sure if I should at first, but I’m glad I did. The young man sank into my arms, and I just held on to him until he was all cried out. I felt his breathing start to slow and realised he’d drifted off in my arms. Careful not to wake him, I scooped the smaller man up in my arms and carried home over to the bed, placing him gently on top of the covers. I’d never been so glad for my strong arm caused by years of playing rugby than in the moment.

I moved his case away from the door, left the key on the bedside table and quietly closed the door to the villa so as not to disturb him. Although not before having one last longing look at the beautifully tortured soul who now looked so sweet and peaceful. Hopefully the rest would help him to feel better, maybe he was just missing his husband, I don’t know why they didn’t turn up together but maybe he’ll arrive by the time that cute boy wakes up.

I head back to the front desk and carry on with the work I was doing when Mr Hope-Spring arrived.

I’d been running the Sarah’s for 6 months now, technically I owned it now with my brother David. We both inherited it when our mother passed away, she opened Sarah’s 3 years ago after I’d finished my first year of university. We’d been coming to Menorca every summer since I was little and my Mum loved it here. So once David had got his own place, and I was living away in Leeds at university, she’d decided to buy this small business not far from where we used to stay. She loved this place, it has 12 hotel rooms and 4 little private villas. It didn’t need much work when she took over, the old couple who had owned it before had very proud of it and kept it immaculate, but they were getting too frail to keep going.

Sadly about a year ago, shortly after I finished getting my degree, my Mum was diagnosed with cancer. I came out to help her run the place while she was having treatment but 6 months later the cancer got the better of and she passed away peacefully in the place she loved. I was grateful that David was here too at the end, we didn’t know exactly how long our Mum would have but we wanted her to know we were here and that we loved her. After the funeral David rushed back to England, everything at the hotel was too painful a reminder for him.

We’d agreed I’d stay on and run the place to honour our Mum’s memory, and David would manage the accounts from back home, putting his finance degree to good use. I decide the best way to honour her would be to rename the mini resort to Sarah’s and I’d spent every day since trying to make it the best I could for her.

I hadn’t realised that I’d drifted off into my own thoughts until a soft hand came into contact with my shoulder. My face felt wet and I realised that I’d be crying, I quickly wiped my tears and turned to see who was next to me.

“Hi,” I smiled seeing it was Mr Hope-Spring.

“Hi.”

Charlie

“Hi, welcome to Sarah’s, I’m Nick, how can I help you today?”, called the far too cheery man behind the desk as I approached.

“Hi,” I replied putting a print-out of my booking on the desk, trying my hardest not to be rude when all I wanted to do was curl up in a dark room and shut out the rest of the world. The man’s smile never faltered as he turned the paper towards him and tapped my booking number into his computer.

“The honeymoon package, for Mr and Mr Hope-Spring,” I inwardly groaned at hearing that name. “Is the other Mr Hope-Spring on his way?”

“Erm, he’ll be coming separately,” I lied hoping this would put the man off asking any more questions and let me get to my room.

“Okie dokie, if you’d like to follow me, can I carry your bags for you?” Nick asked as he skipped round to my side of the desk, like an overexcitable puppy.

“Why, do you think I’m too small and weak to carry it myself?” I snapped causing him to immediately recoil from me and stammer, “No…No, I just wanted to help,” now I felt bad, I knew he was just trying t be helpful but I wasn’t in the mood for his far too perky attitude.

“Your, room’s this way Mr Hope-Spring,” Nick dejectedly said as he turned away to lead me to my room.

We passed down a corridor of doors until we reached a large door at the end leading outside. Sarah’s was a combination of small hotel and private villas. I’d booked their honeymoon package as a surprise for Ben, it included a two week stay in a private villa and a number of couples experiences. I knew he’d appreciate the privacy as he was never too big on being together in public.

We were supposed to get married yesterday, then fly overnight to arrive this morning. Just 24 hours ago I was so happy, Ben and I had been together since we were teenagers. We met when at secondary school when I was in year 10 and he was in the year above. After sixth form he took a gap year, telling me it was so we could go through university together. His parents paid for a flat for Ben to stay in close to the university campus, and we lived together for all 3 years of our courses.

On our graduation day, Ben proposed. He didn’t get down on one knee, or make a big show in front of everyone, we were just getting ready that morning and he said to me, ‘Do you want to get married?’. That was 6 months ago, I’d agreed, and we booked a simple private ceremony, that didn’t surprise me, Ben and I always kept our relationship fairly quiet, so it didn’t surprise me when he said he wanted the wedding to be ‘just us’. He didn’t even want us to tell anyone until after we were marred either, which I didn’t really understand but accepted.

About a month ago, I’d decided to tell my best friends, Elle, Tao and Isacc, about our wedding. They had never been fans of Ben, after a big fight with them a few years ago over our relationship had become pretty strained so I just stopped talking about Ben with them. They didn’t understand why they weren’t invited to the wedding, I tried to explain to them how Ben and I thought it would be romantic to not invite anyone else but they weren’t convinced. Tao even accused Ben of ‘trying to keep me away from them’. Elle said she was ‘happy for me’, but there was definitely a tinge of sadness to her words.

The morning of the wedding, I was waiting at the registry office for Ben to arrive when I received a message from Tao.

Tao {9:35}:         Charlie, I know it’s your wedding day, but…

Charlie {9:36}:   What?

Tao {9:42}:         I swear I want to be happy for you, but I think Ben might be cheating on you

Charlie {9:42}:   No, you’re lying, I thought you were supposed to be my friend!

Tao {9:43}:         I am your friend

Charlie {9:43}:   Ha, some friend

Tao {9:44}:         I saw him

Tao {9:47}:         with a girl

Charlie {9:48}:   She could have been a friend

Tao {9:50}:         He was kissing her, and it didn’t look like a friend way

Charlie {9:57}:   No, you must be wrong, it can’t have been my Ben

Tao {10:00}:       I didn’t want to have to show you this Charlie

Tao {10:01}:       * New reel received *

I watched the reel he sent 3 times before it sunk in. Tao wasn’t wrong, there he was, my Ben, kissing a girl. Not just any girl, it was Imogen Heaney. Ben and her had dated for a few months in school before we got together. I didn’t know what to do, Ben was due to arrive any minute. I could have confronted him, found out why he did it, but I couldn’t bare to think of what if he’s been seeing her this whole time. He never talked about her, or about anyone to me really, when we were together he liked to keep everything about me and him.

No, I couldn’t deal with this right now, I had to get out of there, before Ben arrived, I had to run.

That’s how I now found myself, alone and outside a small but adorable little villa in Menorca.

Nick opened the door to the villa and held it for me as I walked inside. Once I was just inside the door, I came to a sudden stop, I’d forgotten everything that was included in the Honeymoon package. The giant-four poster bed had red rose petals scattered on it in the shape of a heart, there were heart-shaped balloons anchored with strings guiding you towards it and there was an ice bucket with a bottle of champagne resting inside.

Up until that moment I’d managed to hold myself together, but seeing the villa like that broke me. I collapsed to my knees and starting sobbing harder than I ever had before. I couldn’t stop myself, the tears just kept flowing. I felt a strong pair of arms wrap themselves around me and I sank into them and just cried and cried until I couldn’t cry any more.